How deep the Father's Love for Us.

This morning at church we sang the song How deep the Father's love for us. As I was singing, I was instantly filled with extreme guilt and sincere love all at the same time. I stopped and realized what I was actually singing...

How deep the Father's love for us,

How vast beyond all measure
That He should give His only Son
To make a wretch His treasure

What a wretch I am. I am by no means perfect. I am a sinner. But God's love for us is beyond ANY sin, ANY wretch. His love is so pure and so honest. God wants me, a wretch, nasty person, HIS treasure.

How great the pain of searing loss,
The Father turns His face away
As wounds which mar the chosen One,
Bring many sons to glory

God's ONLY Son, Jesus, took the most pain that anyone could EVER imagine. So that I, YOU, can have glory.

Behold the Man upon a cross,
My sin upon His shoulders
Ashamed I hear my mocing voice,
Call out among the scoffers

Jesus on the cross, for me. But yet so many times I am mocking Him. I get angry with God and don't realize the ultimate gift that He gave for me. I literally think of the movie, The Passion, with all those people yelling names at Jesus and not believing what He is about to do. I picture myself there with those people at times when I have the opportunity to tell other's about the WONDERFUL sacrifice that Jesus gave for me, but instead I just fall into the sin of the world. I decide to not talk about him. I laugh when God presents plans that didn't fit my own, not realizing that in the end it's HIS plans that will overcome and will be THE BEST FOR ME.

It was my sin that held Him there
Until it was accomplished
His dying breath has brought me life
I know that it is finished

It was MY sin that put Him on that cross. He did all that for ME. He did all of that for YOU. But I am so overjoyed, that although He suffered and died, I HAVE LIFE, ETERNAL LIFE.

I will not boast in anything
No gifts, no power, no wisdom
But I will boast in Jesus Christ
His death and resurrection

I want this to be my goal. The things of this world will come and will go, but my relationship with Jesus is ETERNAL, NEVER ENDING.

Why should I gain from His reward?
I cannot give an answer
But this I know with all my heart
His wounds have paid my ransom

There is no reason why me, a sinner, a wretch, should gain from all Jesus had to go through. BUT God's love for us is so strong, so empowering, so unconditonal, that HE DID IT TO BRING ME, TO BRING YOU LIFE! ETERNAL LIFE! JESUS' WOUNDS HAS PAID MY RANSOM.

AMEN!!!

what God has planned...

I just read Jesus Calling and I wanted to share this...

"When adversities strike, the human instinct is to doubt My goodness. My ways are mysterious, even to know who know Me intimately. Do not try to fathom My ways."

Isaiah 55:8-9 says: My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts, says the LORD. And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine. For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are high than your ways and my thoughts are higher than your thoughts."

I just thought that was so encouraging to know that we don't have to know God's ways. We try and we try to see what God has for us and we to do the "right" thing that "He has planned". But we fail to really seek His guidance on those situations. We make decisions without consulting Him. We try to do things on our own and we base our decisions on "what God has planned." When we really don't know because we aren't in communication with Him. Try talking with God about things. It doesn't really matter what you are talking about, just talk. God wants that communication with you.

Isaiah says, "And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine."

Think about it.

Journal.

This is me being vulnerable. If you know anything about me, my favorite thing to do is journal. I journal prayers, hopes, and struggles. This is a journal entry I did a few days ago when I found out that I will not be attending Physical Therapy school this coming Fall....

It is funny that I bought this journal the time I found out that I had been wait listed for PT school and here I am venting again. I found out in the middle of class, via e-mail, that I was not considered a candidate for the Fall 2011 DPT program. Kara picked me up after class and we went to get ice cream. When we walked in we ran into Amy, Heather, and the two most adorable kids that Amy babysits. God knew what I needed, friends. After ice cream, Amy invited us to go to the park with the kids. This park had a creek. I was watching the 5-year-old, Kate, play. She was splashing around, trying to have fun while not getting her dress wet. God showed me, through Kate, just how I needed to be. Childlike.

When we were little we would play and there was no worry at all. God tells us to have a "childlike" faith. Philippians 4:6-7 "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." So why, as adults, do we not act more like kids? You do have those times in life where we will get picked last, or not even at all. The best part of this whole thing is that God has picked us. We were never picked last and we will never be picked last again.

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." -James 1:2-4

This verse is my prayer. I pray for perseverance in this season and that in the end I would mature and be complete. I know that I can only become a better person because of this situation that God has placed me in. I can become more childlike, and serve a God who needs to be glorified and exalted.

A year in review...

A few weeks ago at Fellowship,the pastor challenged us to write down 3 of the biggest hardships/battles that we faced in 2010 and also 3 of the biggest blessings that God has given to us in 2010. It was hard for me to come up with 3 battles that I had faced. On the other hand it was so easy for me to come up with 3 blessings.

This post is going to be a picture blog of some of my biggest blessings from 2010:

January:

This was just another Jan-term. The biggest blessing from this month had to of been just spending it my best friend and roommate.

February:

This year I applied and was accepted onto the Step Sing Committee. It was a huge honor and I loved every minute of it. I got to serve alongside my roommate, who was the director, and some of my good friends.

Jane and I also took a weekend away from reality and hit up the beach! We took a road trip to Seaside, FL. We spent the whole weekend in prayer and praise. We just needed a break from life and a weekend to praise and worship our Creator and Savior. It was such a wonderful weekend.

March:

The best thing about this month was spring break. I went with 29 other college friends to Port St. Joe, FL. It was absolutely incredible. We spent each night worshipping and grew in relationship with each other during the day. I grew so much in my faith during this trip.

April:

I ran my first half marathon! 13.1 miles. I did it with my best friend Emily Smothers as well as about 20 other Chi Omega's from Samford. This has been one of my goals since high school. Our goal time was to run it in under 2 hours, we finished in 1:59:??. I don't remember exactly the seconds.

May:

Nothing really eventful happened this month. That's kinda sad.

June:

Thanks to Jane, I was able to attend my first medical mission trip to Nicaragua. I worked with a physical therapist, Larry (pictured). During this 2 week trip, God really showed me that medical missions is clearly something that I need to do.

July:

The biggest blessing this month was seeing my sister, Martha Blair get married. She is an absolutely wonderful person and I absolutely love having an official brother!

August:

I went white water rafting for the first time ever with Kairos Nashville. We went to the Ocoee in Chattanooga, TN. I was obsessed with it and wanted to become a rafting guide.

I started sponsoring the sweetest little girl, thanks for World Vision.

Most crazy of all, I started my senior year of college! This is a picture of the senior pledge class in Chi O.

September:

September brought my senior research project which I FINALLY finished in December. The picture is from our poster presentation that we did in November.

October:

My best friend, Becca, got engaged this month. I couldn't have been more blessed to be involved in celebrating as well as being asked to be in her wedding come June 4, 2011!!

November:

I finally got to go to formal with my high school best friend, Andrew. I asked him freshman year of college to attend, but due to scheduling conflicts he couldn't come. We had such a wonderful time.

I ran in the Boulevard Bolt, a 5 mile run Thanksgiving morning, with Jane. This was my first race since July due to an injury. I was so thankful to be able to run again.

December:

I officially started dating my best friend of 7 years, Andrew.

Kara and I FINALLY placed in the cookie making party with our cookie of Michael Jackson.

Overall, this year has been so incredible. I learned many new things about myself as well as learning more about God and His plans for me. I am so excited to see what God has planned for 2011.